Here are four steps to help the brain change a sustainable stereotype:

Remember all the relationships in which you were not happy. Be honest with yourself and try to analyze what it seemed to you so attractive in people with whom you clearly was not on the way.

If right now you are in a destructive Union for you, the Association with a cigarette will help. It is unrealistic to quit Smoking until you know for sure that in your pocket you are tempted by a pack of nicotine. You will never be free unless you get rid of something that slowly poisons your life, be it cigarettes or an Alliance with a person. Think about ways out of a toxic relationship.

Remind yourself that your needs are as important as those of your partner. It would be good to mark them on paper. Surely you want your desires to be respected, your words to be heard, to be appreciated, to be worried about you, to be true to you.

Changing the needs of the brain, which selectively reacts only to those relationships in which it is bad, is not so easy. However, it can be gradually retrained. If you meet a new person whom you see as your potential partner, start initiating and marking — better even recording — those episodes that do not repeat the previous experience.